SHEILA.

4 years ago..

I went through my old blog and found this… also a lot of craps I wrote back then. Time passed by, now I’m done with 4 years of my 6 years medical degree. Well pretty near to the edge I guess. It was so funny remembering how much I hate China and stuffs, but then now I realized I’ve been living here for 4 years without any history of depression (or worse suicidal lol). 

Looking back to these questions, I am now able to answer some. It’s sooooo funny like I’m going through time tunnel. I remember I used to be that whatsoever girl who’s prefer to be called arrogant rather then act to be friendly to those I barely knew, I USED TO BE THAT GIRL, PEOPLE HAHAHA. Then I remember my mum kinda wanted me to be the nice friendly person, yet she said something in opposite (I couldn’t remember what was it) (cos she knew it wouldn’t work if she just directly told me to). Next thing I know, I spent months pretending to be the friendly-say-hi-first kinda person. Then I’m done pretending. But then I knew being friendly isn’t that bad either. So now, I’m kinda in between. Good thing I pretended hahaha.

Whatever, I think that’s one of my major improvement since high school. I care more to other (aawww… please ? LOL). So now, I think I know myself better, I know how to place myself in society, I know who I need to care about, and who don’t. Cool aye ? 

ALOHA.

OMG HEY PEOPLE !!! I havent written in like for… ever ! I miss writing blogs. So heyhey this is my first post in 2013 (grin). Nothing has changed for the last ummh… 4 years. An ordinary-far-from-genius medical student, a Chinese girl who has small eyes but barely speak Chinese YET still struggling in Chung Kuo, a daughter, a sister, a best friend, a girl (space) friend, A THIRD WHEELER (still) (yey) (-___-) LOL. Nothing has changed except…. (drumroll pleasseeee) MY HAIR. I finally dare to cut it a shoulder length (a little longer). YAAYSZSZZ. That was one of my new year resolutions anyway. So this is how I look now (not everytime only after spending hours to comb, of course LOL). 

HAPPY PALM SUNDAY FOLKS <3 

Facebook, exams, and future

How those words related to each other ??

Sometimes it’s good to looking back at old pictures, thanks to Facebook for letting us collect our pictures online without worrying the space. For me, looking back through old pictures is like looking back to the old me, remembering all the dreams I had, remembering people I might not be with right now, and how did I spent each moments of my life. And all those things are such the reminders of what I should have been right now, or just to remind me of my dreams in case I’ve gone too far from my track. 

So I always spent time to check my old photos during study time (hahaha now I’m making an excuse). I won’t be a naive person by saying ‘the only reason I’m on Facebook when I shouldn’t have to is just to get my self motivated by old pictures’ HA! no, I am not. I am easily distracted. Facebook is so tempting. Youtube, Tumblr, Twitter etc as well. Looking at old photos is so fun. Maybe because I’m missing home too much. And my friends also. Despite all the defenses I’ve said, I do feel those old pictures motivate me. Make me feel such a waste for not working hard (I know it’s sick that I love to feel tortured I mean tortured by deadlines, goals and stuffs). So I usually spend some times to get my self into old photo albums then directly grab my books with recharged mood.

Alright peeps, I gotta go to anatomy lab. YES IT’S 9PM AND I’M GOING TO HANGOUT WITH CADAVERS. Oh how I love my major. So now you know it’s good to cheat your study time by checking on Facebook for a while. We’re human after all :’)

a-e

a. Never let your bf hold your purse or handbag. It’s part of your fashion/appearance/clothing.

b. Hermes is air-mezz, Givenchy is jzhiv-on-shee, Yves Saint Lorent is eves-song-lore-ont. You know how to read Chanel, don’t you ?

c. Take baby oil to remove your eye makeup when you running out of makeup remover.

d. Oatmeal with maple syrup, and banana with yoghurt in the morning are enough to make you up until lunch.

e. It’s okay not to wear body lotion everyday.  

ps. My nainai just suddenly came across my mind. I am going back home in a month yet I’m not gonna see her this time. What makes me sad is not just the fact that she’s gone but more that how much I didn’t know this woman and now I don’t have any chance to know her more. Nainaaiii, I know up there you’re still watching me. Guide me, let me be your proud granddaughter. Love you !

insoMEniac

no, i didnt misspelling that word. I really thought I could find ‘ME’ in word insomniac. 

I don’t know how long I’ve been on this condition (or you may say it’s a disease). I just found my self hard to sleep like EVERYDAY OF MY LIFE. So let’s go over past to see what cause me this.

1. When I was a kid, my dad always told me this (mostly after he got angry with me) “every night before you sleep spend some times to think about what you did wrong today, think about my words, think about what you should do, what youre gonna do later”. Yes dad I did it moreover I DO it everyday of my life, I think that’s the major reason I couldn’t sleep. Not to blame him, but that thing makes my imagination got ‘wild’ in the night. I couldn’t sleep because I could make a novel upon my imagination in one night, because I imagine things I shouldn’t have to imagine (like bad things make me even harder to get to sleep), because when something pop up in mind I just directly grab my laptop search for it, …… because everything happens in the night.

2. …… It took some minutes to think about my second reason. Maybe it’s just my habit. I used to work at night, when everyone already sleeping… that’s my best time to work. I’ve had this habit since in high school. That time I had many many many projects, assignments, exams than other high school student had (my school was a crazy one). So it’s pretty normal for me to sleep only for 4-5 hours in a day when everyone should have 8 hours sleeping at their period of growth. I’ve used to sleep for 4-5 hours for…. 8 years. Yes, I could sleep for 16 hours during the day (my record, so far), I hard to get up in the morning. That’s just because I have abnormal sleeping pattern. 

3. Third, I told you already. My inspiration comes in the night. My excitement is in the peak point at night (I’m such a night person). I just become energetic in the night. I could only study in the night after 9 PM (I’ve started to studying during the day now YAY). It’s just my brain has totally gone with other world side’s time zone.

So, I’ve done some research last night how to get rid of insomniac without prescription. Which quite worked last night.

1. Set your room environment and blablablabla it doesnt work for me.

2. (it works) Supposed you imagine your self sleeping and say breath, sleep, sink (i’m sure there was word ‘sink’) it’s some kind like hypnotizing yourself to sleep. But thanks to insidious, I’m scared to literally see my self sleeping so I imagine my self drowning in the ocean (LOL). I imagine my self drowning in the ocean and I keep saying sleep.. sleep.. sink.. sink. YES I FELL ASLEEP. I’m gonna try it again tonight hopefully it will work again :)

p.s. Do you know that the time when youre about to fall asleep ? Like you’re still awake but you know you’re gonna sleep in a minute?

#just saying

jessicajess:

Instead of being a president, I’d rather be the First Lady

Instead of being a leader, I’d rather be the adviser

Instead of being an artist, I’d rather be the director

Instead of being in a good, heart-thrilling movie, I’d rather be the editor

Instead of being a famous singer, I’d rather be the composer, the musician

Instead of being beautiful, I’d rather be a plastic surgeon 

..instead of all, I’d rather be a servant of God

true that.